Remember when you never made mistakes? ...No one else does either.

Is love really the answer?

Simply, yes.

I mean it's the easy answer when the are lovable or when it's the people in our lives we care about but what if it's the people who are making us angry. How do we show love then? For example, what if it is a transphobic person speaking negatively about Caitlyn Jenner?

Love is still the answer. Love of Caitlyn and love of that person. What is your ultimate goal or wish? That the person you are speaking with would understand and accept transgender people I hope is the answer. What will help them do this the most? Seeing transgender people reflected in a positive light and not the privilege few upper class transgenders like Caitlyn but the ones who are hurting still, who needs homes and hope, and acceptance. They need to see transgender people in their news feed. They need to see positive stories about the achievements of transgender people. They need to see the people they revere having something positive to say about transgender people.

Highlight what  you love. Take care of what you love and ignore what you hate. Think of it as a plant. If you love a plant you will nurture and care for it with love and kindness (work with me here, you really love this plant. And if you hate a plant (who could?! but work with me here) you ignore it and it will wither and die. Choose to spend time on acts of love.

I think my job as an ally is to amplify transgender (and ALL LGBTQ+) voices and to do that I need to focus more on speaking positively about them and leave the naysayers and the haters to...wither and die (I mean, I don't want them to die ...but their hate can.).

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Boundaries are healthy. You get to say who is welcome in your private spaces and how they are welcome there. They can choose to comply or they can choose to leave. If having them in your life is more important than this choice you will choose to make allowances for them.

Ultimately we can't change others. We can only change ourselves or change how we do it or change how we think about it.

What do we do when someone we love is struggling? Say, with depression. We get them a therapist but we notice they are eating more, gaining weight, sleeping more, and picking up bad habits in general. What do we do? What do we do if it's our child?

We leave them alone. We be there for them. We DO NOT judge them or attempt to fix them or for gods sake talk to our daughters about their weight. What children need the most from their parents is overwhelming and undying love and acceptance for who they are. That's all. They just want to be loved for who they are NOW, in this moment. Not to be seen a project worthy of love or acceptance when they meet that behavior expectation or when they are an adult or when they never make a mistake (remember those days? Yeah, no one else does either.). Love and accept them now. Less judgements and more acceptance. Do it for them and treat yourself the same way.

GLEEful Thoughts

I laughed, I cried, I danced, I sang, I loved, I hated, I fell to the depths of despair and rode the clouds of ecstasy. I felt the first beats of love, I felt love endured, love not given a chance, loves unfulfilled promise, love so great it requires you to make choices that hurt you but give new chances to the one you love...THIS is why I watch "Glee". And this is just one episode. ;)

Other thoughts I had about last nights season finale:

Sue's Sylvester's heart grew two sizes last night.

Quinn sure recovered FAST! Craziness... And her 'labor' was much too pretty as TV labor often is but I did love the symbolism in the song and dance that accompanied it.

I love a show that's about teenagers in a show choir in Ohio.... What does that say about me?

The world was ripe for a show like "Glee" after all the sing and dance reality talent shows out there. ex. American Idol, So You Think You Can Dance, America's Got Talent, etc.

Go ahead and say something NICE, I dare ya!

Sometimes we hold our good words or our compliments to ourselves like they are gold or like if we spend them then we are giving something of ourselves instead of just making someone else feel better.
Words have so much power and they are so easy to drop about when we're angry or not feeling well...well, they need to be that easy to come when we having something nice to say too.
We need to quit being so stingy with them and get them out there...they are not costing you anything and could be invaluable to someone else. I mean it's the one gift you can give that will ALWAYS make someone feel good and money doesn't have to leave your pocket...so go ahead, go out there and say something NICE to someone today.

Or sometimes we find it so easy to compliment a stranger or a friend yet we begrudge the ppl closest to us...our family, our kids, our spouse. Maybe because we're embarrassed or it makes us feel vulnerable...BUT we need to get over that. Go ahead and give a little piece of yourself to those you love the most. Tell 'em you love them EVERY DAY and not just on a special occasion. Tell 'em their special, tell 'em why, tell 'em you can't live without 'em, tell 'em they are beautiful, neat, special, HOT, sexy, kind, perfect, angelic, funny...There are a billion things you could tell someone to make their day. Let's lift ppl up and spend less time tearing them down. I consider it one of the best rules to live by 'If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything AT ALL.' :D