Dumb and Dumber Just Got Married!

So I just got back from a weekend in Texas for my sisters' wedding. She was beautiful and so was the wedding. As her MIL would say, dumb and dumber got married. She says she means it affectionately and we all know what she means. They are so dumb and dumber. I'm not sure who's dumb and who's dumber. It might depend on which side of the family line you are on. haha. Don't get me wrong. I love her. She's not the brightest crayon in the box but she's the sweetest. I love her for her. I love her because she's so sensitive that she cries at the drop of a hat. I love her because she's SO blonde. I once told her that our father was on a hung jury and she commented that must have been a long time ago because they didn't hang ppl anymore did they. haha. I love her because she's truthful with me. I love her because she knows how to push my buttons and when not to. I love her because she avoids confrontation and she can't make a decision to save her life. I love her because she lets ppl (mainly me) boss her around and just when I'm about to lose my respect for her because she's being a pushover she stands up and gives them what for. I love her because she has a limit that's a little farther away than most people. I love her because I know how to push her buttons. I love her because she holds a place deep inside herself for our family and what is important. I love her because she respects and loves our Grandmother as deeply as I do. She understands the fragility of life and embraces who she can while we are all still here. I love her because she's impossibly naive. I love her because she's my little sister and always will be.

Now don't you think I could have made a beautiful toast?!? Why didn't I?!? Ah well, it's enough that I hope she knows these things and how I feel.

Disclaimer :Claiming Mental Incompetence

So once again, it's been a few days since I made a post so I feel this innate need to blog. It's after midnight. Somehow I am sure this is not the time I SHOULD be bloggin'. I'm sure to say something I'll regret but then again, thanks to technology and all that jazz there is that handy edit button. :0).

Sometimes I'm sure that I should have been a writer and then sometimes I'm sure I should have been a dance coordinator. And then sometimes I'm certain that I should have been an accountant or an actress or a designer (pick a field, any field) or a poet.

Sometimes I'm certain my life ended when I had children, sometimes I'm certain it began when I had children and sometimes I'm certain that the best things in life are ahead of me.

Sometimes I think I'm past re-inventing myself and sometimes I have hope that ANYTHING can happen. People re-invent themselves everyday. Sometimes I'm sure that I don't need re-inventing. I like myself the way I am.

I'm not sure what I'm trying to say other than everyday my feelings, thoughts, opinions and moods change. I guess you could call this a disclaimer for my blog. I may say things that at the time are true and true to who I am and how I feel at that moment but they may not hold true to who I am the next moment or the moment after that.

I'm beginning to sound like one of those people with personality disorders but here's to hopin' I'm not the only one on this crazy merry-go-round of emotion and life.

Remember I told you that I see things in headlines. Well, sometimes I see them in scenes. Like from a movie. I just had a flash-forward (we'll call it that) where they are reading my blog at a commitment trial (as in sanitarium, mental ward, Rusk, the funny farm, you get the idea). "As you can see your honor, this woman is obviously not mentally competent and can't be held responsible for her actions." I'm not sure what I've done but you can bet I'm probably not mentally competent and haven't been for awhile (take it from me, judge:0))

Ok, like I said, it's after midnight and now I'm just getting stupid. I think it's the pressure from trying to pick out paint for my house. Every room is somehow coming out blue/blue grey. I'm hoping this has the opposite effect of making me feel "blue". I'm hoping it makes me feel serene and calm. I need serenity in life....if only to accept the things that I cannot change.

Goodnight.

My Menstural Cycle and Newspaper Headline Thoughts

So I had my IUD taken out. No, I'm not planning another child right now. I'll tell you why I had it taken out but you can't laugh...I missed not having my period. How weird is that? But apparently it's a common phenomenon. Ok, not that I missed having it exactly (I mean who would miss cramps, bloating, fatigue, tampons and ...well you get the idea) but I felt like skipping it was throwing my whole cycle off..throwing me off...throwing what nature intended off...it felt like tempting the Gods, ya know. I don't know if you know. It's hard to explain. It's like....I think our bodies were made to work in a special way on purpose and deviating from that could spell disaster. They are always finding out horrible things about medicines and procedures years after they started them. Soon they'll say "New medical discovery. New Study's say IUD's reduce life expectancy by at least two years." You know something else that's weird about me (besides 'missing' my period)? I see things happening by way of headlines allot. You know, like when I'm having thoughts (usually sarcastically doomed ones). For example, I don't wear my seat belt to the store that's .2 miles up the road. In my head I'm thinking "Woman Dies in Tragic Accident in Rock Springs; Two Toddlers Sustain Injury". The article reads something like "Ginger Wallace, 28 of Rock Springs, thought that going to the store without her seat belt was relatively safe. Little did she know that statistically most accidents happen within one mile of the home ." Most of the time, this little inner headline voice makes me do things that are safe. It's like my conscience. It helps me make the right decisions ...by being sarcastically dooming. lol. Better safe than sorry I say.

So if you didn't think I was certifiable prior to this post, I'm sure you do now. Let's recap. I must have my period or I don't feel 'normal' and my thoughts often form themselves into headlines. Let's just sign the commitment papers now......